Pretend They're Talking: Episode 1-1

There are the haves....

And the have nots...

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It's not too hard to spot the haves, but it's virtually impossible to miss the have nots in this world. A toy's gotta watch out when it comes to its company. One minute you're hanging out with the Ja-Rus and next thing you know, you're being mistaken for that Dollar Tree trash. So the cool ponies stick together. You'll see them looking lively and privileged down at the Cafe.

"Sometime I wonder if they even, like, check the mirror before they leave the stall."

"I heard they don't. I heard they're too...lacking in funds...to even have mirrors."

"........"

"Word."

"I'm so glad I'm not a Fakie!"

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And in this world, too, are the just plain corrupt...

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Down at the salon, it's all about seeing and being seen. But only if you fit in...

These ponies know looking their best isn't an option but a requirement in today's world. Anybody who's anyone knows that. Only those other ponies seem to not care about what others think or they wouldn't look like gutter trash, right?

"Okay, like I saw that long layers are in, but I need some face-framers too, you know? Just a few."

"Oh, totally, some face-framers. I saw that like Lauren Conrad has some now. But like they have to have like this 80's vibe, you know?"

"Oh my God, everyone tells me I like look like the chick from La Roux so that would totally work!"

Honestly, she didn't think it would come down that way. She had dug through garbage cans looking for bottles to return for weeks and was filled with hope when she finally had enough to get her tangled mane combed out. Dirty forks weren't cutting it. But she hadn't thought that her kind wasn't welcome...

A faint whiff of rubbish hit the ponies' noses causing them to start looking around the salon. A collective gasp of shock was heard as the ragamuffin came into view. She was suddenly faced with a circle of haughty ponies giving their best icy glares.

"Um, we don't, like, deal with ponies like you."

"Huh? But this is a salon...I can pay for it...and what do you mean 'ponies like me'?"

"It means that you need to get out of here! You smell, you're ugly, and you're FAKE! And nobody can help that disaster on your head. You're the kind of pony that sucks the cool out of a place!"

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She was going to make sure THAT didn't happen again.

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"I've just about had it. You ever heard of a pony snapping? Well, I'm about to snap. Go nuts. Take those banshees down. Wonder how they'd like a hoof right in the teeth?"

"Maybe you should give them a chance! Maybe they just don't understand. Maybe if they took some night classes on ponyism..."

"Look, you have hearts on your butt. I expect you to be ridiculously nice. But give me a break! Yeah, that's all they need, just some night classes. You want I should send them love letters?!"

"Dude, she's so traumatized from the hell they put her through that she's been going around with a baby pony diaper on her head for weeks. And you're telling me maybe we should give them a chance?! I'll give them a chance right in the...."

"ME STOMP ON BAD PONIES. BAD PONIES GO SPLAT!"

"Right! Sure! What a maroon! You're just going to go out there and beat them all for us, take care of the problem yourself! Can you believe him?"

"Well, maybe he can! I read this book on the power of positive thinking and..."

"Psst. I have news. Big news. Listen closely...."

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"I'm not going. I can't. I have to hide. Maybe she'll think I left already."

"Um, look, it's totally time for you to go to work and I can so see you. So just get up! No one is going to, like, go for you!"

"I'm not going back there! I'm going to stay under my binkie and I am not going back there and YOU CAN'T MAKE ME and..."

"Ummm...there is totally someone coming. Maybe it's that new dress I ordered because it's been like eons since I ordered it. It doesn't look like the delivery guy, he's not...."