Season's greetings, ho ho ho! Christmas drained me dry, so my energy is no mo'! Finally, here's the start of more eppies to help if your mood's pretty low!
Back at Rainbowville, the Fakie friends had finally taken a ride on the blasted coaster they waited all day for. The little Fakie was so hungry at that point she could have eaten twenty bales of hay, so a stop at the park's ice cream parlor was a must. No one was quite sure why the bunnies had designed the ice cream place to look like a shoe, considering a shoe is just about the last thing a pony would think of when it comes to a place to get treats. Was it supposed to be something to do with Old Mother Horsebbard? The bunnies probably found it somewhere cheap and couldn't resist it. Whatever the case, it was about to get slammed with the biggest order of the day when the starving Fakies showed up....
"This isn't going to do it. I'm so hungry! Thank goodness there's no buffet in here or I'd eat my weight in oats!"
"Geeze, you want more? You've had seven sundaes already!"
"Ooooookay...here's the....rest...of your order. Um, do you want...anything else?"
"Maybe. Let me get this down the hatch and see where I'm at then."
"Ever heard of diabetes?! Ever heard of cholesterol?! It's probably all made with high fructose corn syrup and trans fats and..."
Suddenly there was a huge commotion outside...
All the ponies in the area turned to look at a pony and then went completely nuts when they saw whoever it was. The Fakies wondered if it was just a parade or something but the high-pitched whinnies of the ponies told them it was probably someone else.....
"Should I duck and cover or what?! They're screaming their heads off!"
"Dude, I think they're screaming at somepony, 'cuz they're all looking in one direction and I see a pony comin'. Who is it, Elvis?!"
"Are you daft?! It's only THE CUTEST PONY IN THE ENTIRE WORLD! HE'S COMING! HE'S SO DREAMY! HE'S SO HUNKY I COULD JUST DIE!"
"Um...alright? How cute could this pony possibly be to make everyone insane?!"
"OH GREAT PONY IN THE SKY IS HE GORGEOUS!"
It was him. The stallion that made every pony around him keel over in fits of hysteria. Nobody knew where he lived or what he did, but everyone knew he was the heartthrob of the entire land. He called himself a "punk cowboy" and the name fit, considering he had lassoed the heart of every young filly he met....
Mr. Punk, along with his buddy, loved coming to Rainbowville because they had their pick of any girl pony in the place. He looked like a tough pony but he was actually a nice dude, which just served to make the fillies even more crazy for him. The little Fakie could hardly believe such a handsome pony even existed, but don't kid yourself...she would have never imagined having a chance with him. He started trotting towards the ice cream parlor and the little Fakie felt a cold sweat hit her. She felt she was so ugly, she was embarrassed to even be in this stallion's presence.
Aaaaand sure enough, along came the little herd of snob ponies. Everypony hated these three because they had no shame. Not a stitch. They'd steal your date from you right before your eyes. They'd go flirt with your boyfriend and tell him to ditch you. No matter what you wore, they always had something better on that took every bit of attention away from you. All the ponies knew what was next..
1) Snobby, witchy queen bee pony walks up to cute pony
2) Cute pony forgets any other pony ever existed
3) Rotten, dirty, scumball pony leaves with cute pony
They walked confidently towards the hunky pony with smirks on their faces. You could hear the other girl ponies already starting to groan. Miss Queen Bee Pony, flanked by her two "henchgirls," had zeroed in on the cowboy cutie and no pony was going to stop her...
"Hi there, handsome."
"Oh. Wow. Hello. What do you know?...."
"A totally snobby Little Miss Perfect! Sorry baby, I got better things to do than talk to you, like pick my hooves."
You could have heard a horseshoe nail drop. Nopony was saying it, but you knew what was going through their heads: ZOMG I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING ZOMG. But what happened next shocked them all to an even greater degree. He cantered up to the little Fakie, creating a little cloud of dust behind him as he screeched to a halt just a few inches from her face.
"Did you know you're just like heaven?"
The Fakie took off. She did a spin and then hurtled herself over the patio ledge of the parlor, knocking things over and sending her desserts crashing to the ground. Hot fudge splattered the wall, ice cream trickled down the tipped-over chairs, and a single cherry rolled to a stop in front of the stallion. He was shocked. Did he have something in his teeth? Did his deodorant stop working?
He had to find out what happened. Turning to face the Fakie's friend, he felt a combination of anger and sadness. There was just something about her. She hadn't said a word to him but he felt himself falling for her already. Those big, mournful eyes! Like she's hiding something. Like she needs love. But she ran from me!
"Honey, I've had a lot of gals give me a, like, weird reaction, but I ain't never seen that. What have I, what have I, what have I done to deserve this?"
"Honestly? I dunno if she thinks a guy like you would ever talk to her."
"I'll stop the world and melt with her if it's the last thing I do."
**********
The queen bee didn't take that rejection so well. You gotta be a little gentle on her, seeing it was, you know, only the first time she'd ever been turned down. Don't you feel bad for her?
"Like, ohhhh my God, you have to stop eating those nuts! I know you're upset but like, you're going to get like soooooo fat if you don't stop!"
"Just, like, leave me alone! Like, ALONE!"
"Um, if you're too fat to fit in that jacket now, can, like, I have it?"
